Two Weeks

Hello two weeks, I've been expecting you. Adam told me about you and I trust him. He said you would come and the pain of losing him would lessen with your arrival. I trust in this process. Fully. Thank you for coming so soon. Every day has felt like a challenging run. But I kept running with anticipation and here I am now, meeting you along the way. Not only have I been excited to see you, but I have also had reservations that I know I should not give in to. It's a fear of letting go. With each passing day, the bond that Adam and I have shared is lessening. I know that in order to move on, I must let go. Fully. I struggle because I know what is right but I don't want to do it in this case. But that is the thing, in order to show myself that I can let go of old behaviors which are not good for me, I must let go of Adam to show myself that I can let go of the hardest thing I have ever given up... everything else will seem small compared to this one giant step. And knowing that I am doing the right thing in this case will help me to do the right thing always.

I introduced my Uncle Mike to the band Civil Twilight and in return, he got me their c.d. (and brought me homemade chocolate cake!) You know how some bands just speak to you? I think seeing them perform last fall helped me to appreciate their music more. They are incredible live. Here is one of their songs that I love. It's so inspiring and comforting to me.


"Next To Me"

You are my only escape
You are the reason that I wait
On the corner of this empty street
Oh, I just can't wait to meet

There's so much a man can do
There's so much a man can say
See, I have done so many things wrong
That you should have saw me away

I've got this second chance, I'm gonna take it
I've got this song and dance, I'm gonna take it
I've got all that I need and I can taste it
I've got you next to me, I don't want to waste it

You are my only embrace
You are the light that lights my face
Any fool would do the same
Oh, to follow in your trace

People come and people go
But I know I should have been replaced
I know it

I've got this second chance, I'm going to take it
I've got this song and dance, I'm going to take it
I've got all that I need and I can taste it
I've got you next to me and I don't want to waste it

I'm gonna take it
All that I can get
I'm gonna take it

It's beautiful, the way you move
The way you take me back
Here she comes, around the bend
She's coming to take me back

Oh, I've got this second chance, I'm going to take it
I've got this song and dance, I'm going to take it
I've got all that I need, I can taste it
I've got you next to me and I don't want to waste it

'Cause you are my only escape
You are the reason that I wait